Self-Care Within Trauma  PTSD

 

Self-care has become such a cliche idea that, as often as not, when I bring up the idea I get clients rolling eyes or tuning out. I can’t blame anyone for having that reaction, especially with how the idea is presented in social media and offered as a vague concept by workplaces during “mental health meetings.” Despite the phrase being overused and poorly defined, it’s an important concept. You can call it whatever you want, but let’s talk about the concepts it embodies, especially in relation to trauma and PTSD.

We can think of the energy we have as a bank; physical, emotional, and mental energy can all be deposited or withdrawn. If you were to want to go on a hike, it’s going to require you to withdraw from your physical energy bank. If you had a great night’s sleep, ate something decent for breakfast, and are generally feeling in good health, the energy withdrawal is not going to ‘break the bank’ by making you exhausted or ill. However, if you didn’t sleep the night before, skipped breakfast or had something that doesn’t agree with you, and maybe are struggling with allergies or flu, you’re going to have a pretty bad time and may end up feeling worse. We can think of the energy bank being ‘overdrawn’ because you took out more than you had.

Self-care is kind of similar to this. Any time we do something unpleasant emotionally and mentally, it takes a bit of a toll. It can be small things, such as chores and unpleasant tasks at work, or bigger things: life trauma, grief, and significant life changes. While self-care doesn’t keep these things from happening or keep them from being difficult, it can help keep our energy banks ‘in the green’. 

For a long time when I heard the term self-care, I thought bubble baths and yoga. These can be great and absolutely can be effective self-care, but this is a really narrow slice of all self-care can be. It can be pretty much anything that adds to your general sense of wellbeing; cooking, taking time to spend with friends, watching movies in bed, decorating your space, cleaning or getting chores done, listening to music when driving, and so on. Some of the bigger deposits–things like going on a vacation just for fun–are less practical but have a big impact. Smaller deposits–things like getting outside when the weather is nice or spending time with friends–are more easily fit into the average schedule but may need to be done more frequently. 

Of course, anything that is done with intentionality and purpose tends to have a bigger impact than something mindless. For example, if I spend 10 minutes of my lunch break sitting outside, feeling the breeze and focusing on how the sun feels, I’m more likely to get more in my ‘bank’ than if I were to just sit on the couch for an hour and scroll social media. Social media has its place, of course, but you can think of it as similar to when you plug your phone into an old charger. It’s going to take a lot more of that passive time to get the same ‘charge’ as less intentional time. 

There doesn’t need to be a huge effort constantly to keep your energy bank in the ‘green’, just intentional effort. The more you are withdrawing, the more you need to put in. You can start by asking yourself what you think could be made a bit more fun, or how fun could be added into your schedule. Even taking 5 minutes a few times a day to lean into the things you enjoy is a great way to start. 

Those that have experienced trauma or have PTSD may be at a greater deficit, and it can feel like throwing a few bucks into an account that is massively overdrawn. True, self-care is not going to fix trauma, but it can make living life with trauma, as well as addressing trauma through therapy, significantly more doable. I would be happy to discuss self-care and how it may be most effective for you!